My son experienced a problem with his newly formed company a few weeks ago, whereby he, as CEO, was afraid to admit to his employees that he did not go on an important business trip which was going to serve the company well. For several weeks, he explained that he had too many meetings come up which kept delaying his trip much to his employees’ disappointment.

Finally, out of great pressure, inexperience and human frailty, he told his employees he was going when he really wasn’t. When he told me that, I said, “You know, son, I’m really afraid that’s gonna come back to bite you in the butt. You better tell them the truth or they will never trust you again.” It really bothered me for him because I knew what was going to happen. Sure enough, he was found out by his employees that he did not go, but worked from home. Very upset when found out, my son wrote them an explicit letter of apology to them. Now, I may sound biased because he is my son, but I was very proud of his writing ability to schmooze things over, admit to fault and maintain a modicum of dignity. Not only did his employees understand, but they turned out to be quite concerned that the pressure of such a trip in the middle of a family crisis and his own physical health problems (heart), and all the meetings, were just too much to bear. I hope my son will regain full trust in the future from them. You see, no matter how justified my son was in delaying the trip for all of the excuses (some private), lying could have cost him losing some talent getting up and walking out. I quoted, “Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive!” (Shakespeare)

One of his employees was so concerned, that he offered to be his CTO. Still worried about repercussions, I told my son, that’s enough wearing a sack, cloth and ashes. It’s not Watergate. You were big enough to apologize and opened up to them which is far more than I have seen any employer or manager do in my working career. Some of those old bosses were drunk on their own power and would be too proud to admit to fault. I furthered, “Next time tell your employees things written in stone, not Jello.”

As I write this, he is in San Francisco preparing a major business deal with some big wigs in the Silicon Valley. All of his employees are rallying around him in support. I sent him your blog. I think it’s a lesson everyone can learn whether at work, marriage, or our families.